reminiscence.

I know it is over and alhamdullilah i do not actually cry these days. I somehow can't.. But then i hate to admit, i haven't moved on 100%. Though i somehow pretend that he never existed, i just can't help remembering the times we had together. The moments that we had. And it makes me question things like 'why?'. I know judging on how he treated me, it shows he was never truly in love with me but really.. I think he did yet.. *sigh. See,this is what i was talking bout.. I think back and i can't actually come up with good summary or conclusion. He's not treating me well,yes, i'm more than aware of that but then i do not think he is a bad person. He isn't.. And well,am i right? Or i was blinded. *sigh. I hate him for the cheap way he betrayed me. For the way he 'gladly' talk bad things to my usu, for the way he mistreated me.. But still, i loved him. And i seriously thought he was the one. That was why i put up with him. Thinking that was just dugaan.. I know, i was a fool.. Huhu.

Really i won't doa kan he will get balasan apa.. I just hope he will realize one day.. I know terpulang kepada Allah.. And i don't know..

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Hi ❤

Assalamualaikum. I, again have let this blog go to rust 😂. I have millions of things i wanna say. And i cant bring them all out now.  Anyway, big news, I gave birth to my second bundle of joy on 5th June 2018 @9.45 am. I safely delivered a beautiful princess ; Dk Alisha Inara Ramadhina. Umi sayang alai and abang. I really hope you two would grow healthy and jadi anak anak yang soleh dan solehah. Amiin ❤ I only decided to do this brief update after finding my picture and my name mentioned on a friend's blog. Ham, I know u wont read this but i do miss you and the others. I know at the moment you've changed. I mean good change btw. I am sorry I was one of your friends who did not stop you from going astray back then. I only meant to accept you for who  you are. I miss our friendship. My dad loved you remember? And i used to bring up your name if we want to jalan so he would let me. I wish you are well Ham! I was a bit sad when u didnt come to my wedding. And it was awkward...
Read more

Positiveness.

Assalamualaikum. Past few days, or was it weeks? , I have been feeling so depressed. I can't promise that I am not getting back to that uno momento of mine but alhamdullilah I feel sorta better today. There are still worries and uncertainties but hey I need to learn to stop worrying too much. Life is inevitable. No matter how bad I want it to be the way I want it to be... it is really out of my control. I cannot take control of stuffs. I need to learn to imply that to my life. Worrying too much is never healthy. Perhaps I am feeling this quite positive because I met him last night. I don't know. I am not saying all the negativeness is gone. It is still there. But Yuhana you need to get rid of those negativeness or you won't be able to really live your life. I am not good at balancing things. But I got to. I really need to go with the flow. That saying 'Only dead fish goes with the flow', I need to get rid of it. I have been taking it wayy to serious. Like I fe...
Read more

Another month passed ^^

Goodbye January and helloooo Feb!  One whole month of 2012 has passed by. Time surely flies so fast Friday, 3rd February 2012 HAPPY 10TH BIRTHDAY TO MY LIL BROTHER WAIE May Allah always bless you dear.   Semoga di panjang kan umur dan sentiasa di rahmati Allah. Semoga kau membesar menjadi adik, anak dan lelaki yang berguna dan beriman. Amiin. Kaka LOVES you dear ! AOB The tentative deadline for research submission is in early March and I haveeeeeee lotssssssssssssss to do. Literature review is not complete yet. Data collection too. Result too. Waaaa. So much to do! Chaiyo Chaiyo Insya Allah I, we, can do this! xoxo
Read more